Just An Illusion
It's December and the Christmas tree is finally up in my house!
Two years ago we had a Christmas tree that was over six feet high. Last year, we had a REAL living christmas tree (which didn't like the ornaments hanging on it) in the living room. This year? We have an x'mas tree as tall as Verne Troyer [Mini-Me].
Bringing out the ornaments from the storeroom and decorating the tree brought back memories of the Christmases I've experienced in my two decades of life. Most of them are about my mom who has a knack on driving me nuts and what my family has become now.
Ever since I could remember, my family has always had great X'masses together. We would decorate the tree together, have a nice dinner in a fancy place on the 25th together... just everything we did was together, and most of the time we would be celebrating it together in a hotel in another state because my Dad moves around a lot due to business stuff.
Not until quite recently, things have changed, not that I didn't see it coming. My dad's working in Vietnam permanently, and only comes back every three months for a week. Even though Vietnam has a church around every block, Christmas is not a public holiday there. So my Dad has to work in Vietnam during the festive season.
So now we celebrate Christmas without a husband/father.
Lately I find myself being the only one who actually cares about our tradition. I decorate the tree myself now. My mother would be a 'backseat decorator' after I'm done struggling with the lights and crap. She initially didn't even want to put up an x'mas tree this year. My mother also does not bake her annual X'mas cake soaked in Brandy anymore. She now buys those cakes, which totally loses its meaning.
If I removed the Christmas tree in the house now, you probably wouldn't notice anything else that feels like x'mas. We don't even decorate the house now. No stockings, no holly, zilch.
Since our plans to go to Vietnam to experience Christmas in another country and spend time with my dad has been cancelled, our fancy dinner tradition has also been reduced to just eating dinner at home.
Seems like Christmas is just an illusion here.
Two years ago we had a Christmas tree that was over six feet high. Last year, we had a REAL living christmas tree (which didn't like the ornaments hanging on it) in the living room. This year? We have an x'mas tree as tall as Verne Troyer [Mini-Me].
Bringing out the ornaments from the storeroom and decorating the tree brought back memories of the Christmases I've experienced in my two decades of life. Most of them are about my mom who has a knack on driving me nuts and what my family has become now.
Ever since I could remember, my family has always had great X'masses together. We would decorate the tree together, have a nice dinner in a fancy place on the 25th together... just everything we did was together, and most of the time we would be celebrating it together in a hotel in another state because my Dad moves around a lot due to business stuff.
Not until quite recently, things have changed, not that I didn't see it coming. My dad's working in Vietnam permanently, and only comes back every three months for a week. Even though Vietnam has a church around every block, Christmas is not a public holiday there. So my Dad has to work in Vietnam during the festive season.
So now we celebrate Christmas without a husband/father.
Lately I find myself being the only one who actually cares about our tradition. I decorate the tree myself now. My mother would be a 'backseat decorator' after I'm done struggling with the lights and crap. She initially didn't even want to put up an x'mas tree this year. My mother also does not bake her annual X'mas cake soaked in Brandy anymore. She now buys those cakes, which totally loses its meaning.
If I removed the Christmas tree in the house now, you probably wouldn't notice anything else that feels like x'mas. We don't even decorate the house now. No stockings, no holly, zilch.
Since our plans to go to Vietnam to experience Christmas in another country and spend time with my dad has been cancelled, our fancy dinner tradition has also been reduced to just eating dinner at home.
Seems like Christmas is just an illusion here.
Chewed out by Mystery Wolf at 10:47 PM
:
sigh.. no worries in the words of cartman the wise
'christmas is not about caring and sharing, its about the presents!'
A.
merry jesus birthday anyway :D
Wow u posted this comment only seconds after I published this entry!
... and uh, thanks for the wise quote from Cartman :P
10.47 and 11.25 p.m. is not seconds away!! shows what you know about reletivity and the time space continium, HAH!
sorry, feeling so evil scientist today :p
A.
Let's have a potluck dinner with friends =)
I don't mean on Christmas Day itself, though. Could be a little before, or a little after the 25th. That'd be fun =)
Alfredo,
10.47 was when I started writing that post, not when I posted it. heheheh mad scientist more like... :D
Eh Joy,
That sounds like a brilliant idea! :|
Like... maximum brilliant wey...
dear mich,
something to ponder...why do ppl want to hang on to familiarity so much? tradition is familiarity isn't it? or is it really more? putting up x'mas deco didn't seem so important until noone cares to do it anymore? maybe b'cos this change represented the fact that someone dear isn't around to celebrate it with you, maybe it isn't this rituals that really matter but what those rituals represented that matters. putting up deco wont' bring our love ones nearer but maybe by doing the things we had done with them make us feel that they're near. just a thought. i'm sure all of them will always be near to you in their hearts and mind.-fatfairy
Dear Fatfairy,
Yes it's what those rituals/tradition that represented that matters. It represented doing things together, as a family, one unit. In this case I might as well be doing it with another family and it wouldn't be any different, because we're not doing anything together.
Anyway, since this post things have gone better, tradition-wise and such. So, it's not that bad. Sometimes you have to go through something bad to find something better.
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